Tag Archives: prayer

Is worship the purest form of love?

Tonight, actually throughout the day today, I have been feeling deeply spiritual. I have never considered myself deeply religious but I am deeply spiritual. When something resonates with me, it takes a stronghold over my over- imaginative mind and burrows in there for quite some time. This is the phase when I am somewhat lost…. I am there, but not quite.

Devotional music sways me… not always, not everyday. However, there are days when you suddenly listen to the lyrics of a particular song, devotional or otherwise, and it makes absolute sense to you. One feels as if those particular lyrics are the exact words that he/ she has been wanting to say for a long time… its no longer just a song anymore…. the words then speak directly to us… and entwine around us like a sheer silken invisible veil that might be felt when its rippling against us gently but cannot be seen or touched.

Such is the power of music and of lyrics in a song. Music can make us ecstatic, reduce us to tears and make us break out into a spontaneous dance steps. I have been listening to Hindi devotional songs all day today. ‘Bhajans’ they are called and much to the annoyance of the others, I kept.playing the same number repeatedly until I had learnt every syllable in the song. Why? Deep within me, I felt a sense of much-needed calm, of purity, of a wholesomeness of love that was overwhelming and relieving at the same time. I felt that those words were exactly what I needed to hear at that exact moment…

What are those lyrics? I will write it in Hindi and then translate the words. Hoping I do justice to the unspoken emotion that these 2 lines bring forth. Needless to say, the song is entirely melodious but these 2 lines are the ones I kept repeating in my heart and head.

‘Kaun Kehte hai Bhagwaan aatein nhi.. tum Meera ke jaise bulate nhi’

Who says that the Lord does not come to your abode? Its just that you’ve never called to him as ardently as Meera did!’

These words shook me.

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Meera was an Indian saint, an ardent devotee of Lord Krishna. She was born a princess and  married to a king, but since a very young age, she had worshipped the deity as her own. Meera blossomed into youth and her divine love for the Lord knew no bounds. The Lord was her beloved, the Master of her soul and a friend she hid from all skeptical glances.

Meera’s life was as magical as her love for her Lord was. She was made to suffer numerous hardships but she bore them all as she sang and danced, as if spell-bound before the idol of her beloved ‘Krishna’ To her, it wasn’t  just a stone idol, it was the living, breathing image of her worshipped.

Strange is the connection between a worshipper and the object of her worship. It seldom thinks of self-gratification. It is more about a feeling of oneness with the divine, its about faith and purely, utterly faith.

Meera’ s hardships were never enough to.make her doubt her divine love, her faith in her Lord was as solid and steady as the Himalays itself.And it is said that Meera had called out to her divine beloved with such sincerity that ‘Krishna’ had no alternative but to answer her call. It is said the the ‘He’ was often visible to her in human form. The Lord bowing down before the worshipper’ s pleas. Meera, a true lover and devotee, adored ‘Krishna’ for a lifetime and merged as one with him when her days as a mortal came to an end.

Meera, to me, will always be the greatest lover and worshipper that ever was.  To love with such pure ardour… fiercely and fearlessly… embodies the true spirit of Meera.

Who says that the Lord doesn’t dance to your tunes? May be you didn’t make him dance with you in the way the cowherds of Vrindavan did’.

Devotion and love that Meera had cared not for the splendour of kings. True love merely desires sincerity of  heart and purity of soul that merge into a beautiful something that I do not have the words to describe.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

What is this unforeseen adversity teaching me?

For one, its teaching me preparedness. For once, its simultaneously bringing out the best and worst in me. I’m the fighter and I’m the defeated. I’m the wounded and I’m the cheerleader. All in one.

Its unbelievable and unimaginable…. the sufferings that this accursed pandemic has unleashed upon the world. Staying cooped in our houses and apartments, our worlds have suddenly compressed into the confines withing four walls. It is an incomprehensible encroachment on our freedom, the restrictions that we so suddenly have to abide by. Suffocating, I agree. When I look at my little one’s downcast expression, my insides hurt. But then, I think of the thousands who have lost their lives to this virus, happy families torn apart, friends and families saying their last goodbye to a sick loved one on their phones and devices. Knowing, they will be gone in a matter of days… or hours. That is gut-wrenching!

I have always felt that death has little power over the ones it takes as victims. However, what it does to the surviving family or friends is the hardest part. Thinking of them everyday, loving them more every moment, yet knowing that you can’t see them anymore… perhaps that’s the most difficult part.

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So, in some way, these times are teaching me compassion, love and humanity. Life is so transient, a beautiful yet flimsy reality that can be changed in a matter of moments by an unseen evil… in this case, the virus. These times also acted as an eye-opener. I learnt to forgive, to be more understanding. I learnt gratitude… gratitude that my loved ones are safe until now, that I still have food on my table and even though I cannot visit family and friends here and scattered around the globe, I can still see their smiles, share their anxieties and laugh with them about a thing or two. For a few moments, it does feel like they are just on the other side of my phone, if I stretch my hand, I can touch them. Sometimes it works to fool the mind, you see.

The thought I have had for a few days now is the great unifying power of evil. Agreed that at present, its punching us right in our guts, but nothing lasts forever, so this won’t either. When I read about the services rendered by nurses, doctors, other health care workers, cleaners, delivery men, people who are out there putting their safety on the line of fire so we can breathe a bit more easily, literally and metaphorically, I wonder about their courage. When I think that they too have families and children, elderly parents, grandparents and anxious spouses, who spend every anxiety-ridden second hoping that their loved one returns home safe from the clutches of the deadly virus, my heart brims over. I really salute these superheroes and their indomitable spirit.

No adversity, no matter how devastating will last forever. Although I know its like living in the grip of a continuing nightmare now, let’s keep hoping, let’s keep believing and praying. Let’s not forget the power of humanity and compassion. And let’s keep fighting this menace till it is banished to the dark depths of hell, where it truly belongs.

 

 

 

 

The Wait (A poem of Love)

This wall between the worlds… yours and mine

Invisible. Yet rock-solid

I tried to scale it, yet again, to peep into the other world..

Perhaps you’ll be waiting for me there…just across?

With that devilish smirk on your face…

Which makes me go weak in my knees… Always!

 

I climbed and climbed… it was sky high

And the scratches and cuts my being endured

Just to see you again…and those smiling eyes

What would I not give to see myself reflected in them?

For once, my distracted mind caused my hands to lose their grip

I was falling…falling. I screamed, terrified

I cried out your name, the sweetest sound I held sacred

Futile it was, as I lay in a heap, my heart injured as my spirit bled.

 

Who knows how long I had lain there?

For half-alive I merely was…and the world so silent, watching

Waiting in despair for the moment to arrive

When my life-breath would desert me

When, at last, I could be set free!

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The music seemed so strange at first

And lights dazzled my bleary sight

Footsteps, so gentle, yet so clear

Stopped near me as if to say

“And here I am, I always was… perhaps you had no eyes to see,

I live inside you, precious one, and in your pain you’ll find me.”

 

A sigh escaped my swollen lip, and I could not help but ask…

“Why, my Lord, must I always hurt?

Why won’t you show me you care!”

A smile divine now played His lips

His face aglow as he whispered,

“Brave are you, for you can dare

To bare your soul and embrace your wound

In moments such you’ll feel me close

And hark my call, for I’ll be near

Like the butterfly that morphs, in a magic so rare

You’ll know that your pain has morphed to prayer.”

Goodbye… Or Not!

The darkest hour has come and gone… when I lost sight of you
May be, you removed me from your sight..
who knows which one is true
But when the dreams wake me at night, I lay awake and think
And even though its for the best, my mind gropes for the link
My link to you is now severed, the cords of care have snapped
Like the wind now you are free, my arms no longer wrapped
Despite the tears that must well up, despite the hollow sigh
I say my prayers with you in mind, to you they gladly fly.

We weren’t meant to be, I know, I merely fooled my mind
Your love would always hold me close, your love would always bind.
Now that our ways must part so soon, the pain of loss is more
How can I forget your scorching words that shook me to the core!
Your hand I could not hold for long, my greatest regret be
The memories, those thoughts and smiles are now a part of me.

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Yes, I eat and yes I sleep and yes life trudges on
I wait for you like the dead of night that awaits the morn.
Somewhere you’ve just woken up, my day drags to an end
Gazing at the sunset hues I ask for strength to mend
Heal my heart from the wounds it braved because its love is true
Let my tears now gently fall, they write an ode to you.

Although I know the dreaded day to say goodbye is here
Hope whispers its not goodbye… somehow you’ll still be near

Healing

Have you ever paused to watch
Twilight that plays among the clouds?
Ever marvelled at what treasures lay
In Nature’s lap; its sights and sounds?

Ever wondered how the colours spread
Before the pall of darkness falls?
And how it calms your dejected soul
When it answers the creator’s whispering call?

The rush of day is almost done
And weary feet drag down the lane
On a whim, the eyes look up
And your weary heart forgets its pain.

For there’s magic in the view around
Such magic that is true and pure
The creator’s hand that holds the brush
Has strokes that can all ailments cure.

So if you ever glance up and see
Pinkish hues smeared across the sky
Believe its Him and His hand up there
You’ll feel His love in you if you try.

Your eyes may well with sudden tears
That threaten to spill down your chest
Let them flow for He forged you strong
He knows you will pass His every test.